SheSpeaks SheListens

SheSpeaks SheListens

A few months ago, a friend of mine got int touch saying ‘You have to listen to this podcast!’ with a link to an episode of the ‘Feel Better, Live More’ episode of Dr. Rangan Chaterjee and Johan Hari on ‘Uncovering the Real Causes of Depression’ link: I must admit that my first reaction was, oh another thing talking about depression, I’m not sure I want to listen to it. Yet, a voice within me and an impulse led me to listen. The conversation went for so long that there are two episodes, and I have now listened to both episodes three times. There is so much interesting content in there, and for me personally, there were a few parts of the conversation that really touched me to the point of tears.

Listening to how there is a lack in listening, connecting in real life and a sense of community. I was moved to take action. An idea started to take shape within me. I wanted to take part in helping others to feel heard. I felt I had limited resources to making this happen in person, and so I put my thinking hat on and started coming up with ideas of how to go about doing this. The idea has had a few shifts and changes but I have for now settled with a name and an idea of how I can make this happen online. As my work is mainly focused on guiding women, I thought it was only natural that I made this offer for women.

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Showing up and going live

While I was still in Thailand, I felt a desire and a sort of calling to show up more on social media. I set myself the challenge of filming myself everyday (or almost everyday) on Instagram Stories. I felt there was a part of me that has been keeping me back, as well as a pull to take bolder steps. For me, filming myself, my face, in whatever state I am in that moment, was the challenge. 

Instagram felt safe in a way, I know less people in real life there. And then I started also publishing the videos on Facebook Stories. Not many people use it and it was showing up for people I do know. 

What happened? I started enjoying doing them. I enjoy the challenge of only having 15 seconds to express myself. I felt that this daily practice was helping me gain more confidence in speaking in front of a camera, and expressing myself in general. There is still some curation of what I put, and some days I am either busy or feel too low or demotivated to post. The majority of days, I turn up. I share about my day, or share about some of the thoughts that have been on my mind, sometimes I ask questions too. It mostly feels like I am talking to myself, and that is what I have set myself to do, the videos are for me, if people watch it and like it, then that is an added bonus. 

When I arrived in London, three weeks ago, I felt like I wanted to do a Facebook Live. I wanted to share that I was back and also to explain what I am offering at the moment and some of the wishes I want to make true. By then, I had made so many of the short videos that I was excited to sit in front of my laptop, with the camera on, and just speak from the heart. It felt great and I really enjoyed it. I felt I went in to some flow and I also managed to stay on topic. 

Today, I did a live blog post on Facebook again. Once more, I really enjoyed it and felt myself quite joyful of showing up and expressing myself with no fears. Here is the link to today's post. it has updates on the last year and a bit more about what happened in the 8 months I was away. I hope you enjoy it as much as I enjoy filming it.